So one of the mods added to the discussion...
Julio admits not being a good dad when he lost custody. MANY dads are losing custody who were great fathers. Some were the better parent, even the stay-at-home parent.
I appreciate your post, Julio. But it does not cover it all. Telling all dads to look in the mirror is the same as blaming all of them. I find that insensitive.
But who am I to say we should care about people who are grieving? Oh yeah, people like Jesus and Mother Theresa said the same thing. Maybe, just maybe it's the right thing to do.
I responded...
(mod name),
I guess maybe I failed to make it clear in my post. I believe the first step is to look in the mirror and see what can be improved. That goes for fathers or mothers. I admire you and anybody else that has no room for improvement. I for one see room for it in every aspect of my life. It is merely the first step. In a system that is already biased against us, we have to take the initiative and remove all obstacles that may prove that biased system right. In comparison to my ex, I actually WAS a better parent. Which is a sad statement when I see so much I needed to be a better parent in! I am truly sorry if you I made statements seem to be as judgemental....and far be it from me to argue the words of Jesus and Mother Theresa! lol
Respectfully,
Julio
Sunday, December 27, 2009
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1 comments:
What an interesting discussion you have going on. I find forums to be less than ideal for quality communication. In normal conversation, you would see someone's face react to a statement and you could address it right then and there. Instead, they have to respond and while it might have been a minor thing if caught early on, it becomes more serious if their misunderstanding is applied to everything else you said.
You do a great job being respectful and keeping it light-hearted. Of course, this comes from someone who is usually the one getting ganged up on in the forums so I might not be the best judge of what works in forums and what doesn't. Best of luck to you.
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